Day 45

I can’t believe I’m almost half way through my 100 days, here’s to hoping the last half flies by. I was so anxious being in the hospital, thinking about coming home, but now that I’m home I’m kind of disappointed.

It’s not like what I thought it was going to be, like before I went in for my transplant. No matter how good I sleep or how long I lay on the couch I’m still exhausted. Physically and mentally. I’ve never experienced such fatigue before. It’s hard but I know it’s part of this process and in time it will get better. I’m just so impatient. I just want to get on with my life and do the things I want to do. I’ve been over emotional about it lately. I try to be mature about the situation and remind myself, this is my time to heal. But at the same time I’m 23, it’s summertime, the weather is gorgeous and I feel like I’m trapped inside.
I’ve been going to the hospital weekly for blood work and they found that my CMV levels were getting too high. So to prevent anything serious, they want to treat it right away as a preventive. For 2 weeks I have to carry around a bag with a pump and IV bag of meds that runs through my PICC line twice a day. A home care nurse comes to my house once a day to change the IV bag.

I finally found some energy to go for a small walk with my sister last night. We didn’t go very far, just up to the park near our house. Swinging on a swing is much harder when you’ve lost all your muscle! My grandparents stopped by for a visit this morning to have coffee. It’s always nice to see them. Other than the tiredness and fatigue I’m feeling good. And all my blood counts are higher than ever. My new bone marrow seems to be working just fine.