Last week I visited my doctor at the clinic to find out more information about my transplant. It will be happening in May. My donor is female and she does not live in Canada. That’s about all I know at this point. Seems strange that this person could potentially save my life and I know nothing about her. I wish I could thank her.

After discussing the details of my transplant my doctor suddenly asked me a question. “When was the last time you had a period?” I haven’t had one since I was first diagnosed back in January. My nurse told me that I may or may not have a period during my treatment and that it might not come back until I’m finished.

The doctor told me I won’t have a period ever again. The chemotherapy that I have had so far has damaged my ovaries enough to stop normal ovarian function, which also means I’m infertile. He said that the chemotherapy used to treat AML will usually cause infertility on it’s own but having a stem cell transplant, it’s a done deal. He said if I was able to become pregnant down the road that it would be considered a “miracle”.

I’ve done some research myself and I had read about that side effect. I read that it was a possibility, not a sure thing. If it was a sure thing someone would have mentioned that to me before I thought. I’m 23 years old and I have no children. I’m currently not in a relationship so children are the last thing on my mind at this point in my life but no longer having an option anymore was hard to take.

When my doctor first broke the news to me I was somehow calm and accepting of it. The minutes went by and he continued to talk and I couldn’t help but sit there and really think of how this is going to affect my life after I recover. So many thoughts bounced around in my head. I started to cry. It’s not something I’ve told many people. I don’t like talking about it or thinking about it even. I need to focus on getting better and worry about that part when the time is right The important part is getting rid of the cancer!